SITTIN ON THE BIG PORCH

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 24 #420 episode 185

2009-10-20T09:37:00.000-07:00

The cool water numbed Faith's throat as he listened to Gene and the father argue. The old man mumbled under his breath, never challenging his son for superiority. Gene on the other hand was pointing his finger telling the old man he was going to get the lawn mowed no matter what. The old man startled Faith, during the course of the argument he had never raised his voice until then. With a loud boisterous voice he spoke up.

"That Dolly Dagger of yours is going to get you killed one day and it just might be today. Don't thank I don't know what you up to boy. I been in this world a mighty long time to notice when de milk is sour. And your'n sho nuff rurnt. But if you thank you fen to be up in my house with a half pint to sour you got another thang coming. Today I put my foot down! No more!"

The old man trembled as he spoke. His eyes stared at Gene. The silence had Faith in suspense. They both stared at each other until Gene spoke.

"You are the craziest old man I have ever seen. I'm paying this boy to mow this yard. Besides summer coming up and I don't want no snakes crawling up in this old rickety house. Now I'm gone go and show this boy what to mow and when I get back in here you and me can have it out if you want to?"

Gene was silent as he reached for Faith's cup. He took the cup and told Faith not to worry he was going to pay him for mowing the yard. He walked back to the kitchen to put the glass away disappearing for a brief moment. That's when the old man turned and spoke to Faith.

"Look boy this yard don't need no mowing. If you want to mow something I can send you round to my sisters house. Her yard need mowing. Whatever he paying you I will pay you double. Is it a deal?"

He stuck out his hand for acceptance to the deal just offered Faith. Just as Faith was about to shake his hand to accept the offer, Gene walked from around the corner. He yelled at his father.

"Get on away from here old man! Get I say!" Gene talked to the old man like a dog.

The old man flinched as if he were a dog and cowered over in a corner. Gene opened the door to show Faith what needed mowed. Turning back towards the old man Gene spoke.

"I'm just trying to show this boy how to make some money like you showed me. Is anything wrong with that?"

The old man was silent for a second. Then he began to pray. "Lord forgive me for my sin's, throw them in the sea of forget...

Faith's Bar Miztvah part 23 #420 episode 184

2009-10-06T20:44:00.000-07:00

"Man don't come from man, man come from God!," and with those words he welcomed Faith into his yard. He stood watching Faith as he approached with the lawnmower. His pants shod his bony hips, hanging so loosely that it showed below his waist. They were Sunday past pants. To old to wear to church, yet too new to throw away. He had no shirt on, only a vest to match his Sunday past pants. His bald black head turned a pale pasty pink at its crown. The largest patch being at the front. It's pinkish hue seeped into his dark skin just above his left eyebrow.

"Go on and look," he growled from the porch. "While you staring, you got a plank in yours just the same!" Faith approached with caution. Who was this man, mumbling this nonsense? Faith slowed his pace to a stop, at least ten yards from the porch. He stepped from the porch. His loud voice was reduced to a whisper. Faith could not tell what he was saying but as he got closer, he could make it out.

"You get while the gettin' is good. Look down at yah feets ain't nothing but gravel dere. I don't need you to do no mowin for me, this yard ain't been mowed in 7 year I know. Now you get, get I say!

Faith was scared he did not know whether to stay or go. His feet said go, but his heart said stay. His heart told him he was a man. His heart made him remember the twenty dollar bill in his pocket. Just as his legs were about to decide that the old man was crazy. Gene came from the house.

He came down from the porch shaking his head. "Don't worry bout daddy, he old and set in his ways. I say this yard needs mowing and that what I meant." He grabbed the old man by his shoulders, turning him around and slightly pushed him towards the door.

Gene invited Faith in for a cool drink, Faith accepted. The walk from his Aunt Lela's had been a hot one.

#420 episode 183

2009-10-02T20:01:00.001-07:00

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 22 #420 episode 182

2009-09-21T19:43:00.000-07:00

The twenty dollar bill she gave him felt like responsibility. He had did what the men did, he had worked. He had sweat. He had been paid. He was surprised at how different the twenty felt, compared to the dollar bill. It surely must have been worth more than just twenty of the inferior dollars. With all its beauty they should have made a 30 dollar bill,he figured. He thought of how he would design his 30 dollar bill, while pushing the lawn mower towards Gene's father's house. He looked back at his Aunt Lela's house proud of his work. Turning towards the funeral home he lowered his hands around the handle and climbed the hill. The road was newly paved, which made it that much harder in the April sun. When he reached Gene's father's house he was tired. The only thing that made him feel better was the thought of the 20 dollar bill in his pocket. He would give his mother ten. That would leave 10 for him. His Aunt Lela told him she could take five of it and put it up for him. She said he should never spend all of his money as soon as he gets it. Faith figured she was just trying to pull one over on him. He had heard of her shrewdness when it came to money. He declined her offer.

#420 Episode 181

2009-09-03T20:44:00.000-07:00

A War For Your Soul-Birmingham version from Erisai Films on Vimeo.

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 21 #420 episode 180

2009-08-19T10:13:00.000-07:00

He had heard the many versions of her infidelity. Sometimes the stories were told in anger, at other times with a love so winsome it was like music to the ears. Old folks say, "teeth and tongue fall out, but you don't pull your teeth in spite of." So at this moment and for other moments to come, Lela was the matriarch. They did not always agree with her but the respect she was given mirrored royalty.

She taught lessons to both young and old. Once teaching Sarah how to sew and Mary how to skin catfish. On this day she would be showing Faith how honest work and attention to detail can make even the pickiest of the picky nod their head in approval. He was to mow her yard and then make his way over to Gene's father's house to tackle his yard. He took a breath and leaned into the mower, pushing it to the crest of the hill. It would be easy now. The terrain leaned a helping slant, and the mower practically rolled itself down the hill through the streets of downtown Winnfield.

Past the bank, with it's ever present logo of a black cat. Old Negroes' said it was to stem the flow of black money being deposited. Said White folks believed every Negro scared of a black cat. It must have helped too, because of all the times his mother had taken him with her to the bank, it would always be the one next to the post office. The so called Negro bank. Past the five and dime store, pharmacy and gas station on the corner. He passed the jail where the Negroes barked behind a chain link fence. "Where yo' Momma at?" One barked. Faith kept his head pointed straight. "Hey boy! Ain't you Darlean boy?" Not until they mentioned his mother's name did he turn. Still not saying anything. "Tell yo' Momma, that her cousin Bulldog say brang him some cigarettes up her." Faith shook his head. "Take it easy little cuz." Faith had not idea who the man was. But he would be sure to tell his mother when he got home.

He thought about Lela the rest of the way. Mostly about were the stories true, that they said about her. He had heard many stories just sitting around the kitchen table when his Aunt Learna and Darlean would get to talking about what Lela owed them. Faith found out later in life that the women were talking about the land up in Dodson that they owned. Only problem was that Lela had had a head start on putting the land in one name, hers. While Dalean and her brothers were in foster care. Lela made sure the land stayed put in her name. Darlean and the others complained to no avail. The land was Lela's and the mineral rights that she sold, allowed her to purchase the house she was walking around telling Faith just how she wanted it cut.

Her dark, winkled, stubby finger pointed towards the large ditch that ran in back of her house. That's how far her yard stretched. She made sure he understood that's where she wanted him to stop mowing too. Johnny Ray pulled up just as he was making his second past towards the ditch. The mower drowned out his voice. Johnny Ray tried to amplify his voice by cupping his hands together making a human bull horn. Faith pushed the lever from the picture of the rabbit, past the turtle, to the stop position. The motor died on command. Only then could hear Johnny Ray.

"I was saying to push the mower down the hill and pull it up, it'll make things easier on you." Lela shot Johnny Ray a glancing eye. She spoke slowly, "You the Nigga she got down there now?" Johnny Ray chuckled, his reply skirted the danger of disrespect. Informing her to ask Darlean. With that he patted Faith on the head and turned to his car wishing Lela a good day.

The tires screeched as he started up the hill, seeming to inform Lela of his displeasure in her questioning. Lela's eyes followed the yellow Buick up the road. She mumbled under her breath about Darlean letting anybody around them. Faith pulled the cord of the lawnmower, the motor came to life drowning out Lela's insulting words about his mother.

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 20 #420 episode 179

2009-07-03T12:08:00.000-07:00

He came from pimps and whores. His father, so be told by his Aunt Learna, knew how to dupe an Ofay so good they run him plum out of town. Darlean always told them stories of him. Mostly about his jealousy, and temper. Like the time he whooped her because another seller of flesh told him about a big legged girl he had conquered the night before at the Bucket of Blood. Darlean said she was at home cooking some rice. Said she remembered, because the rice had began to scorch. She went to turn the fire down and that's when his dad come through the door full of venom. Slapping her to and fro. She said she did not know why. A couple of months later the boaster of the big legged girl introduced his dad to her. His dad's apologies accepted Darlean and Robert went on. She said, she knew, she should not have told him. But they were in love. He would understand, and she felt he did at first. But things began to change. She bet her life that her secret had prompted his jealousy and greed. She forever regretted telling him.

That was what he knew about him, his daddy. Buster the street hustler. The big Negro from Phoenix. Faith did not know him, he knew mostly stories, negative stories that made him love her more. She was it his all and all. Now his all in all was waking him with a gentle nudge. He had had a dream about his dad he told her. He was standing beneath a neon green sign grinning at him. He remembered he had a huge gap. Darlean told him he must have went to bed with him on his mind. She said his dad would be proud of him going out and getting work. The smell of bacon made her words collide with his hunger, and she lost. He interrupted her impromptu acceptance speech on behalf of his dad, to inquire about the bacon and eggs smoking on the stove. She said it was for breakfast and his lunch.

"Aunt Lela wants you to mow her yard. Said she would pay you 20 dollars. Johnny Ray gone meet you over there to give you a few pointers." She hurried him off to wash his face and get dressed.

Faith lurched up the hill with the lawnmower seemingly grinning at his struggle to make it to the top. The lunch his mother prepared sat atop it's white motor, anchored by a stretch rope. He knew his Aunt Lela would be extremely picky about how he cut the yard. She was a shrewd woman. Queen of the whores that was his mother side of the family. They all were whores. Not pearl swinging gum chewing whores. But rather, "Ain't them bacon and eggs good whores, ain't that a nice roof over your head whores. They knew how to use what the Good Lord had given them to keep the lights on. And Lela was the best.

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 19 #420 episode 178

2009-06-27T20:13:00.000-07:00

Lela was his mother's mother, sister. Darlean loved her. Her love ran deep. Often she had dreamed of meeting her. While in L.A., she had tried to contact her by using what she had learned in business class. She had used block paragraphs with her signature exactly 3 lines down under the salutation. When she signed it she made her D with a massive curl, in hopes that it would impress Lela. When the letter came back, return to sender, Darlean felt a loss so profound it hurt her to her very core. She had called the operator assistance so many times, using all the names she could remember to find her family. Bonner, Crockerham, Scott, she had used them to no avail. Sometimes she would call just to hear the operator tell her that there was no listing for a Lela Bonner, Scott or Crockerham. Little did she know, Lela had married a railroad porter by the name of Carter. Lela Carter. It was such a common name Darlean kicked herself for not thinking of it during her nightly calls. So simple, it hurt.

Lela was one hell of a lady. She had been born with a withered leg. Her father, not trusting doctors did not let them operate. He said it was because of what they did to Negroes in the Great War. Because of his distrust, Lela struggled. Her crutches were her means to the world. She hopped along for 24 years before she had saved enough money to get the wretched leg cut off. She hopped for 24 years. 24 years of sneers. 24 years of crudely crafted crutches. Hopping along through the rain, heat and trials of mother nature. She longed for movement without those common wooden legs she could not live without.

She had only had the bandages off for 7 months when Darlean's mother died. The first 2 months were pure hell, but the next 5 brought her joy, unspeakable joy. She had been and went and been and went again. The wind felt better, the water tasted sweeter. Everything was vibrant including her. She had felt the arms of a man. She had touched his ears when she felt heaven between her stump and leg. He did not mind. They had drank Club House gin all night. She danced, danced twirled and smiled. Smiling, smiling, smiling.

She told Darlean her Uncle Henry told her about Mattie's death. She said she was confused between freedom and responsibility. That's why she let them go. That's why she stood in the background with her new leg and new love. She did not want to let the moment go. So she let them go.

Faith's Bar Miztvah part 18 #420 episode 177

2009-06-25T07:25:00.000-07:00

His huge arms griped the box. Straddling the box on his knees, Johnny Ray made Frankenstein like steps towards the porch. Darlean kicked at Mikey, arousing the dog from his lazy slumber. Just as the dog jumped from the porch, Johnny Ray sat the box down. He reached into his pocket and brought out an old worn pocket knife. Cutting the tape, Johnny Ray took his knife and sawed down one side of the box. Then he laboriously sawed the other half. The spring sun beat on his brow until beads of sweat oozed from his forehead. When he reached the bottom of the large brown box, he took his hand and pushed the side of the box to the floor.

Faith was amazed at how simple it was to put the lawn mower together. Johnny Ray rolled it out of the box, tossing the instructions to the side, he unfolded the bottom part of the handle. Pointing to the box, he told Faith to get him the other part. Faith fumbled around the box meticulously peeling the Styrofoam that held the top part of the handle. Johnny Ray looking at Faith seemingly annoyed at Faith's slow pace, jerked the handle from Faith's slow hands. "Haste make waste, but you too slow fo' Joe!" Johnny Ray looked at Faith as he spoke. Faith saw the frustration in his eye, and Johnny Ray must have saw the confusion in Faith's eye. For no longer as he had raised his voice at Faith did he lower it and explain how when you working you got to do things as fast as you can to be ahead of the other man that want just what you want. "Do you understand," he asked Faith? Faith shook his head half confused and half understanding. Johnny Ray fastened the handle, and stood up beside it like a proud papa.

"Get me that gas can out the back of the car." Darlean looked down at Johnny Ray as he told Faith to hurry up. "I thought dey came wit' gas in 'hem, she said. "No honey they might catch fire in the shippin', dat be as crazy as hell," laughing at the thought of it all Johnny Ray looked towards the back of the car. Faith rolled his eyes as he lifted the red and yellow can from trunk taking it to Johnny Ray. Johnny Ray's syrupy tongue was about to get on his nerves, maybe he should rethink just how he felt about him again Faith thought. Faith could tell from Darlean's bedroom eyes that he was better in bed, than the last no count nigger she had brought home. Faith assumed the lawnmower was payment for last nights romp in the sheets. One thing about "it" it never lay down for free. Be it a hamburger or food for the house, light bill, gas bill, when "it" came it came for a purpose.

Faith just wished last nights purpose would have been for a brand new bike instead of this massive lawn mower, whose cord Faith was tirelessly pulling. "Put ya back into," Darlean said looking towards Johnny Ray. "If you don't know how ta do it Johnny can show you how." Her eyes flirted as she talked under her clothes on the sly. It slithered into the house. Faith hated It but it would be around, he assumed for some time.

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 17 #420 episode 176

2009-06-22T16:51:00.000-07:00

Faith followed Johnny Ray into the Western Auto. The attendant had on a plaid tennis skirt, stopping shortly before her worn wrinkled knees. She looked at Faith first, noticing his familiar face. She turned to Johnny Ray. Faith was still in shock. He had been rocketed up the hill in a yellow missile. His mother's old Buick had nothing on Johnny Ray's. Faith stepped out of the passenger side door with a new feeling. Something about Johnny Ray was different. Whether it was his awkward, nervous talk around white folks or his confident stride around Negroes, Johnny Ray had won Faith over in their short journey out of the bottom to the Western Auto. Now they stood before the lady with the lightning streaked wrinkles asking, not for a brand new bike. No, not the bike with the disc brakes. Not the bike with the 20" tires. Not the bike Faith longed for. The one with the shinny reflectors. Instead the stood before the green and white beast of a machine. It's menacing dark green hue over took Faith's grin and replaced it with a sad gracious smile.

"Thank you," he said. They neared the intersection where the white folks houses spoke boldly of their superiority compared to the dilapidated shacks that was home to Faith and the other Negroes of the Bottom. They dipped down the hill. It's steepness must have surprised him. His big hands gripped the steering wheel. His foot pushed the accelerator, commanding the car to pull forward. The car took his command, and begged for more demands as the tires caught the pavement with a whistling skirt. Johnny Ray looked at Faith. Faith felt his stare as his eyes followed the contour of Faith's large boyish frame.

"Ya' momma say you bout to be 13. When I was 13 I had my own job. Ya' momma wanted me to get you a bike. But I told her no. Said a bike can't make you no money." He bent his large arms and pointed toward the trunk to the lawn mower crudely tied inside the trunk. He slowed the car to a crawl. "Boy you can take that mow and make you an ass pocket full of money. You just got to go out and get it. Look at your little friends round here, begging they mammies for a quarter. Why you want to be like them? It's time for you to hucklebuck." And with that he pulled into the dusty driveway.

Darlean was on the porch. Her smile at the sight of the large box in the trunk said it all. His smile reassured Faith that maybe this time, maybe this time "it" would not get the best of their mother. This time...

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 16 #420 episode 175

2009-05-29T18:34:00.000-07:00

Gas, Grass, or Ass, Nobody Rides For Free. Its orange letters stood boldly against the white background of the bumper sticker. Sarah was the first to notice. This was because, she insisted on being the first person in line at the bus stop. She would bolt out of bed every morning. Sometimes meeting Darlean in the hall. Sarah would hurriedly dress. Knowing her only competition was Delaney, who lived in the dark green house right across from the bus stop. So there it was, but yet it was different. Sarah no longer cared about the bus stop. She stood above Faith's bed, commanding that he get up, in a hushed tone.

Faith's eyes looked towards the morning sun. He could tell he still had time to sleep. Why was she bothering him. She had never done it before. Usually it was Mary waking him. Her silence warned him of impeding danger. Something was wrong. Sarah was way too quiet as she asked where Mary was. In the bathroom Faith whispered back. Oblivious to why Sarah was whispering. But all the while wanting to know desperately.

It was back... the last time it was there they did not see her for quite a while. Everyday they where at their Aunt Learna's waiting for her to pick them up. Which usually came in the middle of the night. They were awakened from their slumber by unfamiliar hands. Asking her where such and such slept. Faith usually went back to sleep. But every once in a while his interrupted sleep would bother him to the point where tossed and turned. Laying this way and that way wanting to go back to sleep. That's when he would hear them.

Faith turned from the bumper sticker. "Maybe he'll be her just a little while," he said. Faith looked back at the car. It's long sleek yellow paint glistened from the sun rising in the eastern sky. Faith walked timidly behind Sarah and Mary. Each walking with their own thoughts about what the strange car in the drive way meant for each of them. Faith marched towards the bus stop looking in each person's eye for any glimpse of awareness as to the yellow Buick Electra, deuce and a quarter that sat boldly in their front yard.

His name was Johnny Ray. He would be in Faith and his sisters life for the rest of their lives. A truck driver by trade he had met Darlean at the Cozy Inn, the local watering hole for Negroes in Winnfield. He was a hulk of a man. His arms held muscles on top of muscles. His long fat hands cradled a beer as he leaned against his yellow car. Faith stepped from the bus, waiting on his sisters to show them the large man surveying the Bottom's landscape like some type of overseer or something.

"Hello son," his words surprised Faith. He stammered for the right words. His mind told him to let this stranger this "Johnny Ray" he was not his son. Although his mind dreamed one thing, his mouth said hello.

"Your momma tells me its your birthday next week. How old will you be? Faith looked in the large man eyes. What had Darlean told him? "Yes sir," Faith answered. "My names Johnny Ray and you don't have to say no yes sir to me, yeah is good enough. Yes sir, Faith replied. Unaware of his proper reply again. "Come go with me," he said. Faith looked towards the door. Johnny Ray told him that his mother already knew he was going with him. Faith climbed into the front seat. The leather burned through his jeans as he adjusted himself as the car motored up the hill. The motor chimed and begged for Johnny Ray to press the accelerator down even further. He looked towards Faith as he answered the motors request.

They reached the top of the hill and pulled into the Western Auto

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 15 #420 episode 174

2009-03-22T19:07:00.000-07:00

He sounded like he had a mouth full of snuff. A career military man, Faith was guessing. His khaki's were starched with a razor sharp crease. Faith peered around Darlean's rotund hips. The brochure was a simple manila envelope with a multi-colored large U in the middle. It sounded so simple. He told Darlean all she had to do was put the money in the envelope every first of the month and forget about it. Darlean asked him what she should do if she happened to be broke come the first of the month. What if come the first of the month if her kids needed milk, can she just forget about the money then? His red face was all the answer she needed. He was still talking when she closed the door.

"What was he selling," asked Faith. "Life insurance," came the reply. She sounded she was not in the mood for Faith's questions. Faith maneuvered himself in beside her asking how people made money off life insurance. Before she could tell him, a knock was heard at the door. She hastily answered him as she stepped towards the door. "A white man's scam, people gone die anyway" She opened the door to engage the salesman again, instead she encountered Gene. Who stood with his hands in his pockets "Hey there Darlean,"

She greeted Gene with a smile. Faith said hello, and again asked her what life insurance entailed again. He did not want a quick answer such as "a white man's scam," he wanted to know the truth. "Boy gone with that nonsense," as she turned towards the kitchen. Faith was talking to her back now. "Boy gone with that nonsense, when you get grown then you worry about that. Now gone and play," she insisted. Gene followed her to the kitchen.

He spoke again in his whistling whine. He stressed every word ending. Faith thought of the train at the zoo, as Gene spoke again. His mother was telling him how she had some chitterlings boiling and he was welcome to stay and eat. She pulled out a chair for Gene to sit. "Now what brang you down her in da heat of t'day"

"well," he whined. "I was up at the Western Auto and I seen Faith up there.

Darlean shot an enquiring eye at Faith. "You ain't been up there fooling wit' them white folks shit is you boy?" Gene didn't give faith a chance to speak.

"Naw, Darlean it ain't nothin' like dat," he said. Darlean looking at Gene, but talking to Faith warned that she had better not hear anything about him stealing or touching the white folks "stuff" as she called it. Gene smiled, Faith could see he was trying to calm Darlean down while explaining to her the circumstances surrounding their chance meeting.

"You see, I seen him up there lookin' at dem bicycles. Seems to me he want one real bad" Darlean interrupted him again. "He know every dime I gets, go to dees bills." Gene tried to get a word in edge wise. "I...I... know that too Darlean. Dat's why I thank I got a solution. You see, you know the weather is gettin' hotter and the grass is gone start growing like weeds...Well you know daddy, he gone want that yard mowed every Saturday. He den already said that." Darlean shook her head, she nodded up and down while Gene resumed telling her his solution.

"He want dat yard mowed every Saturday, like I was saying. And to tell you the truth, I just don't have time. That's where Faith come in. You see, he can mow the yard while I study for the state exam. I'll give him fifteen dollars every second Saturday. But I wanted to ask you what you thank first."

Darlean's head moved slightly higher. She was always proud when someone had to ask if Faith and his sisters could do something or go somewhere. They were her glory factor. In all her years she had been answering to others. Trying to please others. But when it came to her kids she was the final word. The buck truly stopped with her. She was a slave to the mill, a slave to the bills and unfortunately a slave to men. But with Sarah, Mary and Faith she was the head voice. And, that voice had just committed Faith to a spring and summer of mowing.

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 14 #420 episode 173

2009-03-22T03:18:00.000-07:00

Her hair was cut in the fashion of a cupie doll. Her bangs and eyebrows met purposely covering her long forehead. Her mouth was small punctuated by her thin lips painted red with cheap lipstick. Wrinkles had become a fixture at the corners of her mouth. They struck down her chin like lightning bolts; disappearing just above her thick neck. Her beady eyes reminded Faith of a crawfish. They followed him as he browsed the bike rack dreaming of riding one. He was a regular fixture at the Western Auto. He came to look at the bikes at least once a week. She broke the silence telling Faith how the next time she saw Darlean, she was going to tell her to buy him one of the bikes. He was always dreaming. Faith knew the bikes were just that a dream. Darlean was broke as a straw back mule. There was no way she was going to buy him a bike. Not now, not ever.

The cowbell attached to the door rung its familiar cadence as the door swung open. Faith and the lady both looked towards the door. Gene came through the door at first looking stern, but after seeing Faith he smiled and walked towards the counter. Faith recognized him, but she did not. She did not know who this new Negro was. "How you doing sir," she spoke while coming around the counter. "May I help you?" Faith went back to dreaming. He could hear Gene asking her for 2 cycle engine oil. She told him it was in the back. She proceeded to the rear of the store, Genes eyes followed her until she disappeared behind the door. Gene looked around the store, shaking his head. "Its been a long time since I been in here," speaking in Faith's direction. He walked towards Faith. "Your momma bout to buy you one of these bikes?" Faith rolled his eyes, assuming Gene knew how broke Darlean was and this was his attempt to make small talk.

"Shoot, momma ain't got no money for no bike, even though my birthday coming up. I doubt I will be getting one of these." Faith rubbed his hands along the bike. He wanted it bad. Gene began speaking again. "What grade are you in?" Faith's answer was interrupted by the lady returning from the back. She had two types of oil, one in each hand. Gene walked down the aisle meeting her. "This is all we have," she said while holding the bottles up like one of the models on the Price Is Right game show. "Their both good but if you plan on using one for your lawn mower this is the one you want." she held the green bottle up. Gene smiled at her. "My daddy want me to mow his yard, and I told him he could not put motor oil in the mower. He insisted that oil was oil." She looked at him. "Well if you want your mower to last, you doing the right thing. This here is what you need." Gene took the oil from her hand as they went to the counter.

Faith was done looking at the bikes and walked towards the door. The lady called out that she meant what she said. How she was going to tell Darlean to get him a bike. Gene was directly behind Faith as he made it to the door. Faith held the door open for Gene. Faith turned to say goodbye. That's when Gene told him if he ever wanted to make some money, he could mow his dad's lawn every weekend. He would pay him fifteen dollars, if he did it right. Faith told him he would have to talk to Darlean. Gene crossed the street, looking back at Faith as he turned towards the Bottom.

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 13 #420 episode 172

2009-03-08T17:52:00.000-07:00

"Gene is family! You don't turn family away, no matter what. See, way I hear he lost his job at the hospital over in Houston. Now he home living off his unemployment checks, because his money was long down here. He say he gone go back after six months, but for right now he was down here hunting a peace that only the country could bring. Child he sho know how to use dem big words! Yea..."

Darlean's voice trailed off down the hall. Faith was busy tying his shoes when his mother began talking about Gene. He slowed the squirrel's pace down the hole to hear what he thought was gossip, only to come to the conclusion it wasn't. He ran towards the screen door, she had let him venture off the post and freedom was his.

Faith could tell the weather was getting warmer. The rotten smell of the drying pond water that sat behind the weathered houses, was thick in the air. He and the other kids vowed never to swim in its murky depths. Other than the horses rolling in the mud at it's edge to ward off the seasonal mosquitoes, the pond was off limits. Faith pulled in a lung full and leaped off the porch. After checking all the usual spots, He found out all the kids were busy doing something already. He shook his head. Darlean had waited until well past one o'clock to tell him he could go play. He blamed her for the absence of the children, she knew what she was doing. His only course of action was Western Auto. He started the up hill.

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 12 #420 episode 171

2009-02-11T00:26:00.000-08:00

Faith lay across the bed, dictionary in hand. He was still not allowed to leave the porch. Tired of feeling like a caged lion. Faith resigned himself to his room. The encyclopedia's and dictionary would be his vehicle off the porch, up the hill to a destination people in the Bottom had never heard of. He would be a million miles for the Bottom. Matter of fact; he would be in Tahiti. Yeah, French Polynesia. He would climb Mount Orohena. Dig his feet into it's rich soil. Eat bananas, drink coconut milk. "Faith, I thought I told you to empty this trash, when I left this morning." Faith tore himself from the nice Tahitian girl showing him the east part of the island. His oppressor called. He blew air from his cheeks wondering when she would tire of her cruel but justified demeanor.

"M'am?" Faith answered as he entered the kitchen. cousin Gene was telling her how he worked in the hospital as a dietitian. "Well maybe you can help me get rid of some of this fat while ya down." She turned her attention to Faith. "I said, I thought I told you to take this trash out earlier?" Faith did not answer, instead he trudged towards the trash can. As soon as he was in arms length of Darlean, he caught a slap. "Didn't you hear me talking to you." It was not one of her better slaps. Faith had seen it coming and braced for it. Still he cried. He was embarrassed to be hit in front of company. "Quit all that ol' girly as crying." Darlean stepped towards Faith. Out of the corner of his eye, Faith saw cousin Gene move towards Darlean. "It's alright Darlean, I'll help him take it out."

"You ain't got to help him Gene. He know what he got to do!" Faith grabbed the trash still sobbing. Gene kept telling Darlean he did not mind. "He got it, don't you? "Yes ma'am. Faith opened the back door. Gene was holding the door. He put his hand on Faith's shoulder. "You alright? He had intervened, and Faith was grateful.

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 11 #420 episode 170

2009-02-06T11:26:00.000-08:00

"All a nigga really want is some money. Not me! Now don't get me wrong, I want money just as any other smokestack round here. But I wants it with a smile, a confidence that says "That boy is on fire, that boy goes and gets it." See that's the kind of money I wants. Proud money. Any nigga can rob a bank or steal. I will always work for my money. See money with respect, is money earned." Harold sucked air into his deep chest. He had just given Mary his manifesto, Faith wondered if Harold knew what manifesto was. He grinned inside knowing his vocabulary was superior to Harold and everyone else in the house. He especially took great notice in correcting his mom. He had picked up his dictionary, to lose himself in words, away from Darlean and her manifesto. Away from Mary and Sarah's constant jabbering about Harold Stacknell and his money earning ways. Harold's voice trailed off and Faith found himself drifting through the dictionary.

He was interrupted by the smell of "Weekend" cologne and Darlean coming through the door talking to someone behind her about how she had got most of the pots for the plants at a "rummy sale." Faith rolled his eyes as if to say RUMMAGE, ITS RUMMAGE. It means to go through things haphazardly! I bet she don't even know what haphazardly mean either. One thing about Darlean. If you were family, no matter how distant. How strange. How troubled. If you were family then you were FAMILY. She was especially proud of her father. Even though he was the town drunk. Darlean proudly announced the yellow, long necked man following her. "Y'all come in here and speak to ya cousin. Faith, Sarah, Mary? They must be in the back" She began to call again. When Mary and Harold left the living room. Faith followed knowing it was better to have them there first. Mary was not supposed to let him in if Darlean was not there. With them, Faith could get some fodder for her cannon fire. Sarah came from the kitchen. Darlean spoke, "This ya cousin Gene. He my daddy brother Charlie's son." Darlean pointed them out. "This is Sarah, who's fourteen. Mary, thirteen, and Faith twelve, and this is Mary's friend Harold; who was just leaving." She urged them to speak.

Gene broke the silence. "Well I'm ya cousin Gene. I'm from Houston but I was raised here in Winnfield. Faith instantly found his voice to be whiney. Not the sulking type of whine, more like the high pitch whistle of the train that circles the Alexandria zoo, he thought.

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 10 #420 episode 169

2009-02-05T11:55:00.001-08:00

Anything Faith did out of the ordinary, Darlean would in some way connect it to, as she said, "his trifulness." Even though everything he did, was exactly the things he had been doing all his life. Faith had folded a load of clothes and was putting them away. when he learned that he was no longer allowed in her room. "Just put my things by the door, or give them to Sarah or Mary. I can't trust you in my room. Just might be in their probing. You know how y'all thieves are." Going to the grocery store was different too. Faith could not remember when he started walking to the A&P, but it had been a long time. And every time he would be told he could keep the change, if it was under a dollar. Now, he was told to bring the all her money back and keep the receipt. He was no longer allowed in other people's houses. If he wanted to see his friends he would have to wait outside from now on. "You ain't gone go to nobody house and embarrass me." She said it would be a cold day in hell before she could trust him again.

In the meantime, Harold Stacknell was becoming a familiar face in the Bottom. He had received Darlean's permission to visit on Friday's and Saturday's. Faith enjoyed when he came around. It meant a reprieve from Darlean's constant eye. Harold would sit and tell Mary how he was going to have a house, nice car and enough money to always keep a smile on her face. Mary ate it up. Her eyes would stare out in the distance. Before she knew it a smile curled under her lip. Faith sat watching Gunsmoke, as the syrupy dreams dripped from Harold's mouth. Just to be mean Faith, sowed doubt in his words. "Who you thank you is, white or something?" It worked. Mary got mad. Mad enough to call Darlean to rectify the situation.

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 9 #420 episode 168

2009-02-04T12:00:00.000-08:00

"Faith needs to go back to church. I tell ya Ray he ain't been the same since Morning Star quit sending the bus out. And you know I works on Sunday up to Mr. Ware's. I could drop them off but, Mr Ware wants me there seven o'clock sharp. Yea, its easy money. Hell all I do is make the bed and clean the bathroom, might run and errand for him but other than that, that's about all I do." I need that money. Tough as times is now. I just pray to the Good Lord."

Darlean was on the phone with her gossip buddy Sheila Ray. Faith can't remember how they met but, one thing about Sheila Ray, Darlean could trust her with her most secret of secrets. So it was natural for her to be on the phone discussing Faith's recent thievery. Faith ventured out to the porch. The children of the Bottom were playing like any normal Saturday. Sarah and Mary were busy playing Chinese hopscotch with Etta Jean and Fatty. Faith wanting to draw there attention asked from a far who was winning? Sarah told him to be quiet, he was already in enough trouble. That was the path Fatty needed to ask what Faith had done.

Faith watched as they discussed him. He dropped his head. Opening the screen door, he was startled by his mother. How long had she been there? "Don't hang ya head now. You ain't got nobody to blame but yourself" Darlean spoke the truth. That was the problem. Truth pierced his heart. His conscience was already weakened knowing he was being discussed amongst the children, but his mothers constant reminding him of his indiscretions. Faith's soul felt like a tired horse, lathered to the breaking point.

"Get in this house and wash these dishes," pushing the screen door wide for Faith to pass. Hollering over his shoulder to Mary and Sarah to be watchful for cars. Faith was broken. His mother hung up the phone. It was time now for ridicule in its finest fashion.

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 8 #420 episode 167

2009-01-30T11:21:00.000-08:00

They were his escape. Their tan covers opened to a world of excitement, danger and wonder. But mostly wonder. He had read how water is so scarce in the outer regions of the Saharan Desert, villagers devised an ingenious way of obtaining a water source for the seasonal drought. Faith was amazed at its simplicity. The villagers would dig a hole in the side of one of the many dirt mounds, shifted by the desert's winds. Inside the hole they would put a hand full of seeds, all the while being watched by the ever present monkeys. The villagers would leave the hole, mindful of the monkey's stare. When the monkey senses everything is safe, he cautiously makes his way to the hole. Reaching into the hole to find its booty. Booty in hand, the monkey is absorbed with the prize in his hand he will not unclench his fist. Which ultimately becomes his downfall. Ending with his capture by the returning villager. The villager takes from his pouch a block of salt to feed the monkey. The monkey meanwhile is attentive to the villagers every move. When the villager gives the salt to the monkey, the monkey eats his fill. Only to be tortured by the salts thirst factor. The villager meanwhile tethers a ten or fifteen foot rope to the monkey. Who now hastily leads the villager to his new found water source. All thanks to curiosity.

When Darlean found that lone wrapper deep in the corners of Faith's jeans, Faith felt his face contort like the greedy monkey. He had lead her to his water source. She in turn stood above him as he looked up from the encyclopedia. "What's this?" Her sarcasm left nothing to ponder.

The slap came quickly. The sting that lasted was the problem. "If ya' lie, you'll cheat, if ya cheat, you'll steal. It ain't nothing I hate more than a liar. Just tell the fucken' truth!" Faith knew her asking for the dog leash was next. The dog leash was his best friend when walking the dog. But, when it's white leather was grasped in anger in order to dole out the harshest of his mother's punishment; it became his worst enemy. She repeated her lie, cheat, steal mantra with every swing.

After several licks he was told to get out of her face. Only to be called back. Here eyes were no longer full of anger. The anger was still there, but was now replaced with a pleading eye.

"Baby, momma just trying to tell you before the law have a chance to show ya!"

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 7 #420 episode 166

2009-01-24T05:44:00.000-08:00

She had them lined up. Something was wrong. She came through the door fussing. "Why ain't this house clean? Where in the hell is Mary? Mary came around the door. Her eyes darted from her mother's face to the floor, but mostly to the floor. She knew Darlean was upset. Maybe something happened at the mill? Maybe her boss man been picking on her. Maybe he had talked under her clothes again. Darlean called Sarah and Faith. Darlean proceed to the her bedroom. The children knew to follow.

She spoke before they reached the room. "My soul is stirring about me, something just ain't right." Come to me this morning. Darlean sat on the unmade bed, still talking. "And it was simple as yesterdays news. I got to work, put my lunch bucket down. I walked out towards the floor and something said, "Get ya' gum." "I reached over in the side pocket where I always keeps it, brought it up, only to notice I ain't got but three funky ass pieces! Somebody in here between the four of us know where my gum is."

Mary, Sarah and Faith stood fidgeting. She made them look her in the eye. Mary was first. "Did you eat my gum?" "No ma'am," came the reply. Mary moved to the left to allow Sarah to move. Sarah lined her body to be exactly in the line with Darlean's face. She smiled, Darlean cut her smile short. "I'm serious, I ain't playing! Did you eat my gum?" "No ma'am," came the reply. Faith was next.

His hands began to moisten when his mother first mentioned gum. He had had the time of his life sharing the gum with his friends. They thought he was rich. He remembered their faces as he held the gum in his hands. Opening the foiled wrapped pieces was exciting in itself. He was impressed with the ease to which it opened. Compared to the crudely wrapped Fu Man Chu gum, its wrapper practically invited him to taste. He remembered the taste especially.

In his haste to take a few pieces, he didn't notice the flavor. Chewing came with ease. The flavor burst from its hiding place unleashing a torrent of saliva. It had become a syrupy mixture that overwhelmed his senses. He could still almost feel it"s minty taste teasingly burning his throat. Oh, how he had enjoyed her gum.

He was scared. He nervously looked her in the face. When their eyes met, he quickly looked to the floor. There they stayed. She told him to look up. Faith studied her brown face. It was littered with black freckles. They congregated on her high cheekbones, roosting around her eyes. Her thick brown lips accented with faint traces of pink spoke to Faith. "Did you eat my gum?"

"No, ma'am," came the reply.

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 6 #420 episode 165

2009-01-13T10:20:00.000-08:00

Darlean suffered from the disease of molestation. She was a witness to her own self-destruction. Watching inwardly and suffering mentally, she never trusted any man. Harold was no more than just that, a man. For five straight days he walked from the A&L Quarters to the Bottom asking for Darlean's persmission to visit Mary on the weekends. Every day he would be anxiously awaiting Darlean to round the curb coming home from work. The first day she totally ignored him. The second day after going in early, completing a twelve hour shift she was too tired to decline his offer. Faith watched from the door as Harold nervously tapped the hard hat in his hand. Faith could not tell what was being said, but Darlean had a look of irritation. "I'll thank about it," she told him before telling Faith to move out of the way and close the door. "Mary!" She called out. It was not a loving Mary, but a distrustful Mary that echoed from the way she said it. Throwing her hardhat and gloves on the bed she pulled Mary by the arm leading her to the bathroom. Faith and Sarah raced to the door. "Pull them damn panties off! Hurry up I aint got all day. What was that boy doing out by my mailbox?" her questions were fast and furious. Faith and Sarah listened as Mary struggled to answer. "He bet not have been up in my house. Faith knew it wasn't her house turning to Sarah for agreement but she was too busy listening. Darlean yelled for Sarah to come there. Knowing she could not go straight in Sarah tiptoed to the door of the living room, only to stamp back loudly. She stopped at the door, "Yeah momma?" "Get your ass in here so you can hear this too!"

Darlean began spewing a list reasons why you can't trust a man. She empahsized every point by telling them that "it" would make a preacher lay his bible down. Faith knew what "it" was. It was their cookie, their privates, their thing, their pussy. Darlean began to cry as she explained the virtues of a real woman. A woman she was convinced she could never attain. She wanted things to be different for them. Never would they be given to the wolves she vowed. Her sentiment still held true as she invited Harold in on his fifth day of waiting by the mailbox.

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 5 #420 episode 164

2009-01-12T07:13:00.000-08:00

The bulge in Harold's pants drew Mary's eyes to it like honey to cane syrup. She listened intently as Harold told of his daddy's experience at being his own man. He said how his daddy had taught him the virtues of hard work and ownership. Said he was gone be the same way. Take care of a woman that is willing to let the world know of his fruits. Mary's eyes darted from Harold's face to his crotch. Playing a hide and seek with each others intentions, their eyes finally caught each other's attention and shamefully looked to the ground. Mary grabbed the broom from Faith's hand opened the screen door letting it slam behind her. Faith took his position on the front porch asking again what he was doing writing on his porch. Harold's contour was decidedly different now. his once aggravated look took on a friendly tone. Harold smiled, "I tell you what little man? If you tell your sister there my phone number, I will tell you what I'm doing writing these numbers on the step. Faith hurriedly grabbed the paper from the head board of his bed.

The crumpled paper was familiar with the confines of Faith pockets by the time he handed it to Mary. In all the excitement of Harold explaining the numbers and how they correlated to how much wood his daddy would have to buy with the money Albert Taylor had given him for doing the job. Whatever was left, Harold called profit. Harold emphasized that the numbers had to be correct to better the profit. Faith's mind danced just recalling the numbers. He was just about to figure out the profit of his imaginary job when Mary , asking for the second time jolted him from his imaginary encounter with the sales clerk at the local builders supply. "When he give you this boy!" The glee in her face made Faith feel important in her life again. He excitedly handed her the paper. Jerking it from his hand Mary raced to the front room. Faith and Sarah followed. Sarah made it before Faith. Mary was pressing the last button. She put her hand to her mouth telling Sarah to be quiet. Faith asked loudly who was she calling. They both turned to him, silently yelling with the expressions on their faces. Faith ignored their silent threats and asked again. The door slammed shut. Faith put his head close to the door. He heard Mary as she spoke to the voice on the other end. "Did you give my brother this number?...I see, what you do that for?...Well next time if you aint man enough to give it to me yourself don't be sending my little brother to do your errands...I'm just telling you...Bye!"

They giggled together as Mary explained the whole thing again to Sarah. Who standing next to Mary when she made the call, still happily asked to hear it again.

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 4 #420 episode 163

2008-11-26T23:58:00.000-08:00

When things start getting normal, you look up and don't even know what time it is. The dog barks every day at every car that goes by. The ditches flood after a hard rain no matter how many times the large blue and white ditch digger blocks the street for their repair. Faith knew the routine. Take breakfast for instance. He knew on Monday they had scrambled eggs. Tuesday, eggs over easy. Wedsday, cereal. Thursday, oatmeal. Friday, grits. Saturday and Sunday every person for themselves. This Saturday Mary had dropped a bowl of dry cereal on the kitchen floor and was impatiently waiting for Faith to bring her the broom to clean it up. Faith was outside watching the boy write on the side of his old steps.

"What you doing writin' on my house," Faith asked the boy who was stooped over his steps. When he did not answer, Faith asked again. Looking down from the porch. Faith raised his voice "If you don't quit writin' on my porch, I'm a go get my mamma" Faith knew his mother wasnt there. She had walked up town with her friend Poopa to do something. But, he wasnt sure what. So that made him the man of the house. The boy payed no attention to Faith's constant questioning. From the back of the house, they both heard Mary yell for the broom. Faith turning from Mary's voice back to the boy writing on the porch. Putting his foot on the first step to emphasize his point Faith asked again. Harold stood up. All six feet of him, looking nearly eye to eye with Faith. Speaking in a matter of fact tone, Harlod told Faith, "this wasnt his house in the first place, it was Albert Taylors!" Faith
countered telling him it may be Albert Taylors, but his momma was buying it from him.

"Your momma aint buying nothing," Harold replied. Y'all sitting in this house and probably don't own nothing but your clothes. My daddy said y'all being asses for Albert Taylor. See my daddy different he own his own business. Where your momma work? At one of these mills probably slaving for the white man." Harold would'nt let Faith get a word in edge wise. The only thing that stopped him was the presence of Mary on the front porch seeking the broom. Mary looked at Faith. Feeling the tension in the air, she asked was everything alright? Before Faith could answer, Mary turned to Harold.

"What you do to my brother?" Faith noticed her demeanor had changed slightly when she asked Harold the exact same question. Faith began to tell her what was going on. Mary quickly insisted he let Harold talk for himself. "I was just telling your brother that y'all don't own this house, Albert Taylor does." "Aint we buying this house, interupted Faith. "Tell him, tell him aint we buying this house!He writing on our house and everythang!" said Faith campaigning for his sisters attention whose eyes were now clearly affixed to Harold Stacknell.

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 3 #420 episode 162

2008-11-24T00:07:00.000-08:00

Everybody said it was roots that had Esther laid up like she was. Hear say it was a spurned shoulder that did her in. Whatever it was; she took to the bed right before New year and ain't journeyed as far as the bathroom ever since. Otis worked extra hard to get her the finest doctors down in Alexandria that money could buy. But still he was told there was nothing they could do. When hope was at its end, he drove her to Robeline to see the Hoo-Doo doctor. That's when the man told Otis it was an old girlfriend of his that put spell on her. He said he could not heal her but could make her feel better. Sure enough she was up and about in a couple of days. Only to be confined to her bed a month later. That's when the test say it was Multiple Sclerosis.

After her diagnosis, Otis busied himself swinging his hammer. He would take any job, as long as it paid something. With all the problems he had growing up, he had come to believe if you threw enough money at it it would go away. But, no matter how much money he threw, she still got sicker. So sick that his mother moved in with him to help with raising his kids.

Otis was working for Albert Taylor, repairing the front steps to all the rent houses in the Bottom, when Faith met him and his son Harold.

Faith's Bar Mitzvah part 2 #420 episode 161

2008-11-21T08:04:00.000-08:00

Harold Stacknell was the son of a man. Many men consider themselves men, confirming it by bragging on their gourd vine. But, Otis Stacknell was different. Otis was a man! His father died on a cut saw down at the old sawmill. From that moment on Otis' mother depended on him. At the age of six he started working the pulpwood trails. His small arms straining to to carry even the smallest pieces of wood. He sat with the men at lunch. Listening to them talk of women, wine, and bills. How a man had to be like a dump truck when he gets paid. They pointed at him suggesting how he ought to live. Constantly reminding him that he was a man now. He took their advice too. Working hard, getting paid and giving his earnings to his mother weekly. Sometimes, the money wasn't much but it helped provide for his mother and himself. He made the most money being a carpenter's helper. When he gave his mother the folding money, he knew carpentry was for him. He married Esther Harris and they had two children, Harold and Elaine.